Lost in the Shuffle

Doors open.....people walk through......doors shut.....and im the only one left in the spacious hallway....even sound has left me......vacancy takes over my soul......theres no station to go and fill up what is empty........the bell rings and another set of groups walk in chatting, laughing, discussing a foreign word....LIFE....the doors open up again...I try to take a peep at their destination, but my eyes are suddenly blind........why can't i see where they are going?....is it because I know nothing of life?....I know neither life or death......time is motionless for me...the legs and arms of action have been amputated......once circulating thoughts are now stagnant....no longer am I left to wonder about being left to wonder... a sad state I am in....lost in the shuffle

somthin i came up with today....

when i was up in my apartment no food no rent

and i had no cash only dreams to spend

i knew my roomates couldnt stand me

i felt like a kid rocking hand me downs knowing one day stacks of bills they would hand me

but they aint fan me

so i was hot at the world ,my girl ,and everyone in my family

they was like oh we miss him....but i had no relief like a katrina victim

so i promised to myself i would katrina stick them

cause it was forget me forget him we will let fema get him

but what didnt kill me made me stronger

longing for a shot just made my time longer

till it came out the barrell of the burner

i became a gunner with a go get attitude....a runner

no vacations in the summer

cause to vacate the only thing that i had which was college

showed no solution so i had a problem

and niggas tried to hammer me with words so like nails i said screw em

imma treat em like nike airs and just do em

so while they was limping like isaiah

i was the only knick in the game that was ewing

The Pull

The steps to the Pavement are not hard to retreat to

Cause when school is in session I gain somthing they cant Teach you

no Rocks no Keys

But like Clinton they try to impeach you

From the office of Hope some way they try to reach you

Take 10 steps to go back 20

My words flow to the sky but then it comes back to me

Igniting a Fire....but its not a flame that should fuse me

There are many Clouds so when it rains its so confusing

I cant even see who launches the attack

As I get blown from this coldesac....to a Dead END. they qoute on that

Im another number for their stats

Cuffs "CLICK CLACK" because it just clicked that I have to stay strapped

The hood got its own mafia and I'm not tryna get whacked

But there no way out I cant rap because I'm wack

Worlds on my back from my mom talking that

I should go to the track....to traffic that smack

I try to hint that I would rather not be reavealed to that

But reality Reveals to me that thats where it is AT

I could go to college to be educated in the books

But all I've been reading is court dates being Booked

constant Strain and Struggle

Pain and Scuffles in the mind

I dont know what to rebuttle

John Doe

I've seen this road so many times before.... the ladder that was presented for me to walk up was floored..... there I was on the floor on the forefront of greatness....and in the back of my mind it was stored....somthing that I couldn't quite put a name to.....but not ordinary like john doe....it was a life that I was already ordained to.....it was sort of like a kid who family buisness is a fortune 500......but my family was fortunate enough to have at least a hundred..... dreams stuctured on a high rise so what i build could get me far......shoot I see the stars in the tv screen....so I make these wishes that go God make me large....cause all I wanna do is touch the sky and be a star....at least 10 feet off the ground i will get that far....I know it's not that hard..... I just want to get my point across to the world so I can pass it to the right drive that will steer me..... but clearly.....everybody else doesn't want me to put on a pair of tires and travel down this road to make my future higher..... cops want to cell me up........wrap me behind the bars.......... so I can rap bars.........every guards in the jail favorite imprisoned rap star...... so they can rap to me....."when you get out you'll get that far until you commit another crime I know it aint that hard"....... another quota for there qoute that goes "back again...I knew you would be"...... the girlfriend tries to tie me up with an emotional connection that unplugs me from my profession...... her touch her words her love .......mean nothing to the degree....of me tyring to get a degree......we go to different schools....I'm outta of the state and she's in LA UC and the fact that she doesn't see me......she wants me at a CC..... she says if I leave my face you will never see..... I say I see a better future for us that's lifts us over the sea...and she told me "well you can see all that but you can't see me......I dnt kno why you go to school you'll never get that far.....frontin like it aint that hard".......so here I am broken dreams because I will never get that far..........and to go back to the hood isn't that hard.....I mean honestly I'm acting like i can get that car......and I see that my girlfreind hasn't gotten that far........and the cops on my block isn't that far.......a distance not to short like that cloud from that star.........but my pops say that I'm looking at it with the wrong sight.......its farther than what I see but its closer than what I think.......which means I'm closer to fulfilling what people see about me because I'm farther from my dream cause I listen to what they think

signed john doe a.k.a the average brother in america

The Downfall

So many sweet dreams have poured sugar down the girl.....sticks of the cane stick....highly addicted to the pearls....she swallowed whats inside the herbal tea is in a swirl.....spiraling down the case.....the stairs of the world.....she gets stares from the world....she stares at the mirror the reflection stares back what they have is intact....but she is out of contact to the life she used to fish....she's now not given the life she used to live.....so that life she used to live she doesn't get back to the roots....so she is cut into a hollywood scoop that they are proofing to dish......expressive thoughts that go " she is losing her way, the song that she sung doesnt exist any more" from her freinds who think that she thinks this negative is cupid......repetitive acts of the bad is what she is now couped with......even though the roots are unescapable she would rather go toothless.........

The Love.......The Downfall

The Love

she had one of them long faces....that said my soul aching..... because they idol me like aiken..... 400 dollar ticket..... a stack for the hotel..... and all is well but she aint ready for the placement.....cause she been having fun round here.....she missed over the seas....but would with rather run out here....she dont really wanna go there it stays on her mind here comes her go out tear.... attached to her is the smell of the air....sounds of the city and the breeze on her hair...they asked her do she get scared... she say naw..... like I know God take care each and everyone of yall.....then why u cry....and she simply said cause I cnt be everywhere in the world like God.... but this is my job....this my note....this is my song

The Question

why is it that dying is most feared....but the easiest to do?.....why is it that life is the most sought after.....but the hardest to tackle?......and why is it that when life is handed it to you ........everyone wants a clear path to run.....leap.....jump.....towards success....without letting the thought of man I wish life was so easy die?....... do you notice how actors put on a great show for the audience?....I'm mean really....they sweat.....speak loudly into crowd......do things that are out of their normal everyday life....play different roles.......laugh....cry.....worry about there level of energy.....stress the fact that this has to be the best play ever put on in the history of mankind.....all to do nothing but take an easy exit off the stage.......and you know what the crowds says?....man what a great play.......do you know what they said about malcom x?.....man what a great mind....do you know what they said about ghandi?....man what a great leader....do you know what they said about bill gates?.....man what a great nerd.....what will they say about those who did it the easy way?.....man I don't remember....or what about those who tried so desperately to take the easy route but made the road ahead so hard for themsleves?.......man what a waste of a possible gift that could have been obtained....question your work ethic....dnt leave your legacy a question

And they say im Suicidal..........

face mugged among the pixels of the screen..... a nightmare for all the kids fairytell scene....unfairly seen as a monster....while others were rarely deemed.....it was sowed in his genes...just take a look at his seams...dark blue ink stuck in the mind it couldnt be washed..couldnt be stopped like wind against a chime.....and when u heard the sound you knew that it was time...get in the house or you were sure to die...not in the flesh but of the mind...are you ready to die?...they say i dont want to die..i want to keep living this lie....let me lie down my life for you....i mean honestly have you seen a t.v show lately....graveyards is what they sell to the babies....they can cut an umbilical cord..circumcise the penis.....but how come what they prescribe they cant cut...they leave it to be connected to the mind....if we would have stay connected to the past time...pass the torch to the springers so they can jump past the past lines.....non social barriers that are inferior to the social gains....the exterior of a great thought is now taken in vain.....so when i say i think about dying my thoughts are not suicide.....only truth of mind so in the heavens i will coincide.....coexisting with the great minds that are rooted with knowledge deep like the grape vine.... who didnt live to die.....they said die to live....only so you can die to live.....so i die to live and then die to live....so when stupidity dies down you can see that i died to give...... and they say im suicidal

Silence, is it really a Virtue?

how many times do we have to go back and forth until we can go forward on this road that's straite..... we twist and turn ....we have broken the lines so the drive in our love is not safe..... my inner thinking has led me to internal conflict that I intently continue to chase...... you have a pot of boiling steam stemming from the voice that is so deep with rage that you consciously vase.... but what if that vase breaks..... I wonder what type of food for the mind did the wrath make..... beef boiling between us creates a situation that is high in stakes....... who will make a move first pettiness becomes involved...... until one day we see that pettiness has evolved into a man I can't stand her..... girl I hate him.....I regret the day that I told him I would date em...... every time you call I go here she is again....I don't have time to begin this shit so I'll just press end...... now I'm sitting here asking myself questions that I should have asked you in the beginning of our problem that cannot be solved...... and its eating me alive in my mind because my actions that i dished turned out to be raw...... both of us in an attempt to paint a perfect scene ended up missing the big picture......if all these words stated in this body of work were labored into the mind maybe we could work It out...... but we can't because our lives were actions with no sound....actions speak louder than words.......but no words at all creates an action that is so proud that it won't even answer to the law of the land.....so i ask you.......... is silence really a virtue?

Dont waste your Breath

I Am Legend

I am inspired to become....inspired to be......inspired to have done........inspired to die a legend........I am inspired to walk.....I am inspired to run.....I am inspired to fly....I am inspired to reach for the stars........ I will be....I will have done more than any other....... I will be the last standing thought......I will be the last breath of life that jumps into the air......that circulates through the soul......comming out within the lungs..... I will have sung a song any note can relate to.......I will have played a drum that carries a heavy beat..... that rises those to their feet......to take a dance at life....but not of the usual routine....... to become.....to be....to have done..... to die a legend.....to walk.....to run.....to fly......to reach for the stars.....to be.....to have done more than any other...... to be the last standing thought.......thinking to inspire a mind......thinking to change a time........ I am inspired.....I am legend

Freestlye in the po eemmm form......

been gone a couple months spent some years down the road...... you rained on my summer and on my spring you snowed.......I missed your flowers the sweet cent of your rose...wishin I could smell the sweet scent on my nose....I talked about you to all of my freinds.....we would converse about the first day you took me in......bright city lights I would feel your wind....fill up all your needs so I won't feel your end.....in the morning your sunlight would guide me to school.....I always brought you home plus my parents like you....kept you in my heart on my mind in my lungs too.....pissed on anybody who would try to front you....like that bad boy sticker minus the bad boy get up.....every minute that I missed I missed her....every picture that I flicked I kissed her....told em excuse me miss but I'm her mr...and I can remember...I've always spent all of my time with her eversince the sixth of september....she was the blanket that wrapped around my frame....so imma blanket her with recognition from my fame....imma blank it her with bearing my last name....so if they step in the woods they get clawed by her rage.....everytime she speak I get awwed by her range....she touch me from the bottom to the top of my frame......this is like my homecoming so I can't wait till we off to prom......red carpet....camera flashing the pigmentation of what I dream I oughtta song....like this be my rose....I love you pasadena my heart is home

By far one of the best albums ever heard through my ears....i mean musically theres no album that compares to seeing sounds.....they could have just made the album full of instrumentals, because you could feel the emotion of he music...you didnt need lyrics to help depict the feelings that are brought to life through music.....musically no other album compares......

?

I play my life out through words....any thing that I ever wanted to be or I am going through is heard....paper is my bestman...I'm wedded to the pen....she throws her flowers out everytime a song spins......though she spills all that is known about me I know she will sun me....I will never shun thee...this is joy upon glee.......as good as a team that his parents are is what I hope my son could be.....and when I'm done with this game still undone are we.....I know MJ still hits up the court....so if I left it alone I wouldn't be a good sport.......I used to feel as if I would stumble upon greatness and just fall short....and its still a couple of things that I cannot sort........like why my wife sisters let some of these niggas get rich...when they pensmanship is so poor......I just wanted to pin my ship on the seas to sail across the world but deals always seemed to fleet......I do know now that if everything in the world runs out on me my blue inked ten will never leave.......I cnt concieve what life would be without her......my voice is heard...but with her....my words are louder

Bathing part 1

i once met a ladie who said my life is like the act of bathhing....im sittin there like ok anddddddd.....and then she said no hear me out.....you start off with a empty tub....two opposites get together to fill it up....and so the water never flows out you put in a plug...see its just like love.... here i am a woman whose is empty of a companion...and my feelings are cold because i just got done with a guy who dealed me dirt....im looking for a man who could wash away my pain because im tired of crying on my bestfreinds shirt....you see most men are the bubble bath type because they jump into something that appeals to the mind....settle in the water and play with the bubbles...and when there all gone they hop out everytime....im looking for someone to soak deep in my soul and heat up a heart that is o so cold...that i can trust and will never waste a breath on so when we go under water i dont have to hold my nose...i can let it all go so when i do come back to air i kno this is where my heart is suppose to flow...and everytime i feel that the water is gettin cold you turn on the heat and tighter you hold...... to be continued

Sluts

ok.....I learned today how much I hate sluts......espcially those who think they aren't sluts........and those who when you be talkin about sluts they get real quiet cause they dnt wanna people to kno they're a slut......the sluts who think there your man when there nothin more than a slut.......I dont like sluts.......if ur a slut and I kno it.....imma call it out.....and I forgot about those who front like they stopped sluttin around...and sucked a nigga dick today probably...those who like to goggle niggas kids in they mouth...those who mess with dirty ass niggas.....man sluts are worse than roaches real talk..and I dnt like em...lmao

Understanding

to understand is to over plan....to handle things gracefully and do wat i can....to please your needs at the expense of me.... because you mean much more than any of my needs....cause i have my life all figured out but your is one i have to adjust to....just as mines so i adjust you....but understanding is i have to adjust more..learn more... love more...just to protect you...time is the key that opens the door to understand...act too fast and you have underplanned...act out to her because the time is limited will probably lose the reace of being her man...growing takes time....time takes a mind that is willing to move at a slow pace and let the time unwind....to unwind takes more time so you can get to the point where you understand each other in no time...cause once its arrived it has arrived....takes 9 month to make a baby but the moment it breathes its alive...takes years for the child to understand that he was placed on this earth because a women and a man...but once its known its known forever...and onces its loved it can only get better